wannabelyn (wannabelyn) wrote,

  • Mood:

It's sorta positive and not

Another week, pissed away just like that. Spent the first 2 days in KL house hunting and I think we've found the right place. I really want to fix the place up. I get inspired by these people who spend a pittance DIY-ing everything and yet the place looks amazing. I also figured it'd keep the boy occupied while I'm at work although he's not receptive to the idea. "well what if the land lady finds out we painted the walls?". The walls were stark white with furniture marks, I'll paint them back white FOC without a sign that there were ever any furtnire marks when we move out.

Right now, I just have to figure out what 2 ppl and a dog would do with 3 baths and an toilet. I guess I could bathe in a different bathroom everyday.

The one thing great about being back is having family support. My dad got a new LED so they have decided to donate their LCD which is pretty decent with FULL HD and all to their soon to be poverty stricken daughter and her BF.The boy managed to get a new electric stove, rice cooker, microwave owen (I don't get why they cost so much here), kettle and some misc items donated by his mum. We saved very close to 2k alone just on these items so it was very much appreciated.

I've officially been on holiday for 5 months now it really feels more like 2 months.

I have this sinking feeling in my heart everytime i think about work. I start on Tuesday. It's always been a struggle for me, I hate cocky people and i try not to be one but not being full of myself kinda makes me feel like I'm not very good at what I do or I won't be good at what I do.

At times I think of the positives, I would safely say that every manager of mine would never hesitate to rehire or recommend me. I got all the agencies I wanted over here to respond to me. I focused on 2 and I'm pretty sure I would've aced the other 2 had I not turned down the opportunity to interview with them.

Everytime people hear that I'm from Ipoh, it's kinda like "Oh (sounding dismal and concerned) KL is very different from Ipoh, people here are very on top of things, professional, cut throat etc etc". I've been also getting that vibe from people. It's really weird for me to hear that because I haven't been working in Ipoh, I've been living and working in Sydney for the past 8 years. Sydney is the most competitive market in Australia and I almost feel like you're saying to me that we people who work in Sydney don't measure up. Well, why are all the agencies in Singapore hiring so many Australian resources then?

All that's said and done, most of the time I actually feel the same like I'm not going to measure up or get along with anyone.

SIGH. So many insecurities.
Tags: life
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